2016-01-06

Me and my bipolar issues

Hi there, welcome to any new readers and lovely to see you again to all of you loyal ones!

I need your help. I've been thinking a lot about this blog. I started it in 2012 when my days was so much about depression and anxiety. I suffered from insomnia and periods of hypomania. Suffering was the key word. Suicidal thoughts and earlier attemtps to kill myself in 2007 and 2008 still influencing my everyday living. It's not like that any longer. I can't say I suffer at all. I have a good life. I'm still bipolar, I have it in me and always will. I have bipolar disorder like a backpack or part of my brain. Sometimes I think about it, sometimes I don't.

What I'm saying is that I consider myself a person, a human being. Not "a bipolar" or "manicdepressive". In 2012 anxiety had me in a firm grip, sometimes I sat in the sofa with so much worry in me it was completely impossible watching a film or even sit still. No focus, not able to relax at all. Today I can be restless but almost never with that claw clutching my breast, making it hard to breathe.

It's 2016 and a new year is always a good time to start over. Leave the past where it should be. Look forward, with hope and faith. Life gets better! Good days are coming.

Back to my blog. What should I write about to make it better and more interesting? Why have a blog at all, you might wonder? Easy, I love writing and I love expressing myself this way. It's not like I'm aiming for thousands of followers. As long as one person reads it, the blog has a purpose. Anyhow, I'm wondering if I should do it any other way?

I guess consistency is a good start. Now I write whenever I feel like it, and maybe once a week would be better. At least once a week, and more often if the spark hits me. Is that a good idea?

And then, topics. Do you rather read about concerns and issues that have to do with bipolar disorder and mental illness or is whatever in my life and my thoughts good enough? I've been writing about whatever I want to so far. Sometimes it is a strong need, to tell something in particular. Sometimes it's just something, whatever comes to mind.

Do we need to set up some rules here or do I just keep on like I'm doing?

Please feel free to tell me what you think. In a comment here (at the bottom), on Facebook, via an e-mail or whatever suits you best. If you're a troll, please feel free NOT to tell me anything at all. That said, I know you all are constructive and helpful! Thank's in advance!

It's fucking cold in Sweden now. Some day, hopefully soon, I'll try to make enough money to go visit a friend of mine in Australia. And then, of course, California is waiting for me!

Dreams dreams dreams - dreaming is for free!

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